the quiet

My house is quiet. There are no toys to trip on while running through the house. The dishes are clean because I haven't even been cooking. I have my favorite candy on the counter - I don't have to hide it in order to save it from being eaten in less than 3 minutes.

However, there is a cute squishy toy frog sitting here on my desk that makes my heart miss a little guy. And this morning while opening the front closet I found my gal's pink bucket hat that I was looking for yesterday. I instantly wish I could get it to her to keep her shaded from the hot sun. :)

Mackenzie and Nate are down in GA - having a great time with their Grandparents! They drove the 8 hour trip yesterday with them and I received text messages that spoke of movies, Go Fish, and honking at the state lines. Yes, it's gonna be a good week full of memories for those two!

I was full of agony while trying to make the decision of whether to let them go or not. It wasn't so hard for Mackenzie since she is almost 6 and understands time and makes great choices. But, Nate is only 2 and it was hard to make that choice for him. In the end, I reluctantly let him go. I instantly knew it was the right choice. My mom called it right - telling me that she had a feeling that I needed a break. :)

Without the older two, my mind has time to think. I'm reminded of my days with only Mackenzie as a baby. Ryan and I have had a couple complete conversations - - instead of letting them drag on for days! I've started a project or two. I've read half of a book and started a 2nd. (fully intending to finish BOTH!) I've shared Bible reading with Ryan. And this is all within the last 24 hrs!

I am enjoying being a mom to one this week. I've played on the floor with Addelyn and watched her figure out this crawling thing. I'll make her more food to stock-pile in the freezer. I'll read to her and bathe her in a bath all alone. When we eat meals we'll put her in the middle and both be able to tend to her every need. Ryan and I will dote on her...because that is what we should do with our babies.

God is recharging me - quieting my heart - reminding me of my loves and what I love to do. I'm enjoying the break even though I have to make myself NOT call every 10 minutes to find out what they are doing!

So...for the next few days I will sit. and think. and read. probably eat out. and shop. yes, shop. for jeans. and swimsuits. and shoes. i will work out. talk with ryan. laugh. and watch movies. and at the end of the week I will savor the hugs and kisses from my two oldest and love them all the more.